My editor recently came back from a family get-a-way, he came back with a story so infuriating and god damned hilarious that it made it into the ranks of the daily annoyances. I’m going to give this story as it was given to me in the interest of authenticity.
After a long week of fun,sun,and family it was finally time to head on home. Bags are packed, everyone says their goodbyes and it’s off to the airport for our happy family. After arriving at the airport almost two hours before the flight time and making the long journey through security, our family is struck with the news that the flight departed early and they would have to wait until morning for another flight. Our happy little family now has to find a hotel that offers a shuttle to the airport in the early morning hours.
Our happy family finds a hotel, piles into the shuttle and makes the pilgrimage, discouraged but still standing. At this point the journey has taken them well into the evening hours, having supposed to be home by now no proper meal has been eaten for our travelers, so they set out for the in hotel restaurant. Our ravenous group are set to order their meals, a simple cheese burger for the father and the same for his son, however, as his son is a fiend for french fries and will likely eat all of his as well as most of his fathers french fries, our heroic patriarch seeks to avoid this by asking the waitress to double the amount of fries on each burger order so his weary son may enjoy them with reckless abandon. The waitress offers a retort, telling the man that the standard amount of fries is quite large, our hero politely fires back that while he understands this, he would appreciate doubling the order. The hag like waitress is un-flinching as she suggests that they start with one order and “see how that goes”, the stalwart hero strengths his resolve and persists that the extra fries be given, the troll like french fry Nazi is seemingly defeated! She writes the order without further word and continues on.
The food finally arrives, but alas something is amiss. The plates are lacking the requested amount of french fries, the slob gives the hero a wink and tells him that they gave the “Little Guy” a couple extra.
The story ended there, with both of us laughing to no end.
I heard this story and instantly began to think, this fucking hag has one job, a job that assumes she will be able to handle the task of writing down a fucking order and replying with only a simple “It will be right out” which as we all know is a fucking lie! No where in her job description does it state she is supposed to concern herself with what a patron potentially will or won’t eat, she is simply supposed to shut her fucking mouth write down the order and give it to the people who will do an actual job and cook the food. This lady is at the bottom of the fucking barrel, even for wait staff. You are not in a fancy fucking restaurant, serving celebrities dainty and dignified meals. You’re in a glorified slop trough serving tired fucking people sub-par food, shut your fucking cock hole take the order and happily skip your fucking way down to hell you wretched sloth.
The worst part of all of this, is that even after persistence from the customer, this fucking cum bucket took it upon herself to place the order as she saw fit, and when she delivers the food she acts like shes some kind of fucking hero for giving “The Little Guy” a couple extra.
I’m not gonna go on about what a vagina toothed bitch this lady is, I’m gonna wrap this up.
Fuck that waitress, fuck any waitress who decides they know better than the person ordering, fuck any holier than thou piece of dingle berry that humors someone like a coward and then does whatever the fuck they want anyway.
Got a problem with me shitting on some fuck bag waitress? Sack up and fucking tell it to the turtle, coward.